adolescence

Whispers of a forgotten secret from long ago,
that was how we carried on.
We didn’t care that the only thing that kept us going was the nostalgia, the memories.
We pretended that life was a game of storytelling.
Reality was all but a short distance away, but we preferred the slow paces and familiar routes.
The others would pass us by and laugh their superior laughs.
We would turn our faces and act like nothing could touch us.

We were wispy children stuck in the past,
unable to move on from the life of daydreaming and lollygagging.
Our refusal to grow up had brought us strength, dignity, and pride.

The option of an elder life had never interested us.
We were no stranger to their lifestyle of bravado and business.
We preferred the silence of simplicity.
The exposure to responsibility was too much.

In the faraway, distracted world we had created,
we were content,
we were joyous.
We were undeniably adolescent.

#6

quote/song of the day

“because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself.”
-breakfast at tiffany’s

“anna (go to him)”-the beatles

mornings w/ Jesus

Yesterday, I was first introduced to Young Life campaigners by my friend Nat Simkins. I was nervous because it was my very first time going with a lot of new people. But, I left feeling rejuvenated in Christ because I was influenced very heavily by something we discussed.

After we read a passage, one of the leaders asked us where we felt the presence of Christ most in our lives. For some reason, mornings were the first thing that came to my mind. I suddenly realized that mornings are one of the great ways Jesus shows us His blessings and power in our lives. When you wake up, usually you’re still groggy and would love to just sleep the day away-especially when school starts back up. We never realize how lucky we are to be able to live another day. We take our days for granted and typically do not live them for Christ. This doesn’t make a lot of sense since He is the one that gave them to us…so why wouldn’t we praise Him for it? We continue to be greedy with our time on earth and not give back to God. We dedicate all of our time to friends, having fun, jobs-all of which are awesome to have, but time for God gets lost. Everyday when I open my eyes to another day on this earth, I am going to try and learn to thank Jesus for another day to give back to Him. I will start my day thanking Him for the multitude of blessings He’s given me-my amazing family and friends, a roof over my head, plenty of food, an education, etc. Most importantly, I will thank Him for never leaving my side and always being a constant presence in my life, no matter how many times I push Him away.

#5

quote/song of the day

“be soft. do not let the world make you hard. do not let the pain make you hate. do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness.”
-kurt vonnegut

“this old dog”-mac demarco

risk taking

Confidence is something I have always wished I could easily acquire. I admire people who live a fearless life-those who live without fear of judgement, fear of consequences, etc. But, that’s just not who I am. I am afraid of taking risks and ‘living on the edge.’ While incessantly engaging in risky business of course isn’t the best choice of lifestyle, sometimes risks are necessary for life. I am an extremely indecisive person and often when I am faced with a serious decision, I shut down. I ignore all of the issues because I am afraid of the risk factor and what it involves. At times it seems as if the threat of choosing the wrong decision overrides anything else. We allow our fears to poison our minds and affect our decision making. We cannot let our own self-made poison destroy our abilities. We have to follow our hearts and tackle the challenges before us-because life is a tough series of risks that we have to pummel our way through, one way or the other.

#4

quote/song of the day

“the story of life is quicker than the wink of an eye, the story of love is hello and goodbye…until we meet again.”
-jimi hendrix

“freely”-devendra banhart

paradox girl

hook, line, and sinker
i attach and detach just as easily
i’m a paradox girl
trying to distract myself from what i
love the most
the biggest loss.
i fall in love with ideas
in order to pass reality by with a
fleeting stare of contempt

the stars swim in my eyes
while i hide

#3

quote/song of the day

“you are never stagnant. you are either growing and maturing, or falling behind.”
-nick selby (quote was shared with me by the wonderful kate monahan)

“lake michigan”-rogue wave

change

After my trip at Edisto Island had come to a close post-Memorial Day weekend, I recalled the time I had spent with my friends.  My senior year at Aquinas is coming up fast and I was startled to realize how much time I was losing-with them and with everyone else. Most of the kids I hung out with have graduated, and although we aren’t all close, it would be one of the last carefree moments I would have with each of them. By this time next year, we will both have so much more on our plates. Once I start senior year, they will have gone off to college to start a new chapter in their lives. I realized I would be parting ways with my closer girl friends as well. This hit me hard and I struggled to comprehend the inevitable-change.

When you’re in high school, it seems as if the only objective is to simply get out. What I don’t think most of us understand is that it is the last four final years of being a kid. We are all rushing to live on our own and become independent. Once college starts, it is finally time to start growing up and becoming an adult. I personally am terrified of change. I hate thinking about what is to come because I am a notorious over thinker. All it does is stress me out. What I fail to understand is that change is necessary to grow as a human. Without change, everyone would live in a static state, where there is no room to grow and learn. Although I still have time to be a kid, I struggle to grasp how much time has flown by and before I know it, I’ll be in college. I will be an adult. All I ask is that God guide me and my friends through our senior and freshman years in college. I ask Him that He help me understand and accept change for what it is. I will cherish the remaining time I have left with my people and let no moment go to waste any longer. We all need to appreciate life and the people around us a little bit more each day (:

Savannah

#2

quote/song of the day

“remember this, had any other condition been better for you than the one in which you are, divine love would have put you there.”
-spurgeon

“need your love so bad”-fleetwood mac